The Job Hunt

I had found the perfect summer job at last!! Or not. I had just spent a summer of not getting a job in the crowded summer job lists of California when I opened up an email from the CougarEat, my former employers. I could have guessed what they wanted just by reading the email description: Fall signups. Sign ups? Who wanted to sign up again for that place? I had enough experience slipping on ice into huge trash bins and cleaning tables for three long hours every day. However, to not open a CougarEat email meant that it would automatically blow up your computer and sent lightning crashing down upon you!! I left the email sitting in the inbox for several days not believing all the wild stories that I had been told when suddenly boom!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lightning struck out at me! I just had to open up the email. So I opened it up and replied "Yes I will join your team." I was secretly thinking though, "I'll get them to rehire me and them and then infiltrate their system so that no one has to ever be a host. Waaaahaaahaaaa.

Let's fast forward to my second week of work as I was initiating my evil plans. I got to work and looked at the schedule board. What? I had to work with some new kid named Chris? What happened to my last coworker? Yes! My evil plan was working I already got rid of one person! Just some new kid to get rid of now. I walked out nonchalantly and began to perform my duties when suddenly I spotted my new target. There the Geekboy with the glasses. That had to be him!! He came right up to me and asked me to show him around. I began to give him the usual tour. The whole tour. I showed him everything he would need to know. There was the trash bin and the trash cans and I explained to him how you'd have to wear slimy goggles to lime away the water station or his eyes and hands would be melted by the smelly chemical. So far so good, he would never want to come back to this place.

Wednesday I went back to work laughing at how my evil plans had worked since Chris was no where to be seen. I started putting out some utensils and then.. boom, there he was! Wearing a hat to fool me! No my plans had not worked. For a week Chris kept coming back to work, despite my warnings to make him take all the trash every single time.

Paycheck day came around. Yes! Money for sabotage was all too sweet. I rushed home and checked route Y for the profits of my labor, but there was nothing there. How odd. I rounded on the secretary the next day and asked about my paycheck. She looked and found that I was missing from the payroll. Had I been sabotaged? Then the secretary made a few phone calls to my former manager. *We had just switched managers. And then the most scariest thing happened! The secretary grew a few feet taller than me and looked at me sternly saying, "You have been terminated. We know about your plans to sabotage the CougarEat. Apologize on one knee or your money all goes to Chris. Well what do you think I did? I apologized and got back to work.

Working didn't seem so bad after I stopped trying to find ways to sabotage the people who employed me. Hey I even had an interesting coworker. I was excited one day when I logged into facebook, and activity that I seldom do, and saw that I had a new friend request. Really who? It was Chris. Curious enough to start snooping at his profile, I added him as a friend.